Cutie Pie
by LittleMissYuki
Summary: Hanji wants Levi to take a break and spend time with her. But when Levi refuses to do so, Hanji has no other choice but to annoy the living heck out of him until he accepts her invitation... Rated T for some language.


"Hey. Hey. Levi."

"What is it, Hanji?"

"Can I hug you?"

"Why?"

"Because I love you."

"Leave me alone."

"But I don't want you to be alone." Hanji leaned over the desk Levi was working in, who was trying desperately to get whatever he needed to do done. But alas, she wanted him to give her attention, for he hadn't looked at her once and didn't take a break for hours. "Leviiii," Hanji whined, poking his shoulder. "Why don't you take a break? Men need to relax too, you know."

"I don't need a break."

"Look at you, all stressed out! You clearly need a break."

"Hanji," Levi sighed. "I think I'm perfectly capable of working without bullshitting like you do all the damn time." Hanji let out a loud laugh that suprised the young man. "That's not true, silly! What I do is more dangerous!"

"I see... considering that your subjects are dead now."

"Uh, yeah..." Hanji chuckles nervously. "B-but lets not worry about me. I'm worried about you. I declare that you take a break!"

"I declare that you shut up, Four Eyes."

"Oh come on! Please?" Hanji looked at Levi with puppy eyes, and he just put his hands on his face. He then stands up, and walks over to the bookshelf to look something up. Hanji fold her arms, scoffing at him. "Hey! That's not taking a break!"

"You know, Hanji, I don't think you understand how busy I am with all of the shit I need to do." Levi doesn't look at her. Hanji walked up to him and snatched the book out of his hands. "What is this stuff anyway? Seems boring."

"I swear you will be the cause of the hundreds of deaths here..." Levi growls and takes the book back. Hanji giggles and takes something out of her pocket which was a folded peice of paper. "Here. To cheer you up, I want you to have this. I drew you a picture." She hands him the paper and he takes it and unfolds it. It was a badly drawn picture of himself. "The hell is this?!" Levi asks, confused. Hanji sighs happily, remembering the memories while drawing the picture. "I drew that for you. Do you like it?" She waits for an answer. Levi blinks and suddenly rips it up, throwing it on the floor. "You're cleaning that up," he says walking out of the office.

"Do I have to?" Hanji asks.

"Yes, in fact, you do. If I come back here and that's not picked up, I'll-"

"Okie dokie then!" Hanji cuts him off. Levi leaves the room to do other things, while Hanji began to plan something.

A few minutes pass by, and Levi had returned. He realized that Hanji was not inside, or so it seemed. He was suspicious, although he felt a slight relief to be alone again inside. Yet as he was about to continue doing what he had to do, two long arms wrap tightly around his shoulders. "Boo! Did I scare you?!" Hanji asked excitedly. Levi sighs again and didn't even want to shake her off. "What do you want from me, Four Eyes?" He gave in. Hanji giggles and lets him go as he faces her. "Its so boring here. We should go do something with our friends! Besides... I've never seen you have fun for once."

"I was already having fun."

"Oh? And what were you doing that was so fun?"

"Not talking to you," he joked, although the joke sounded very cruel.

"Ha! Your so cute, Levi!" Hanji let a big laugh escape her body. Levi rolled his eyes and said, "Don't call me cute."

"Fine. Your so handsome. Feel any better?" Hanji asked, sarcastically. Levi gave her an annoyed look on his face and folded his arms. "You know, you really look ugly with those glasses on you."

"At least I can reach the top shelf!"

"I'm going to kill you, Hanji."

"Not if I kill you first!"

"Get out." Levi pointed towards the door for her to go away, and Hanji walked backwards, trying not to laugh. "Fine. But I'll be back...just you wait, my love."

Levi came over and shut the door on her face when she left. He saw her slowly leave, watching him. When she was gone, he looked around his office and saw something white on the wooden floor. It was the poorly drawn picture, taped up together again. Levi blinked and crumpled it up only to throw it in the trash. Levi began to feel something inside of him. As if he was missing something. So to keep his mind off of the feeling, he began to sweep the floor- and mainly because of Hanji's filthy shoes being outside all day. Levi ended up cleaning up his whole office the way he liked it, and felt at peace doing so.

"...You missed a spot."

Levi looked up quickly to see the energetic woman again, one eye staring at him through the cracked open door. "What the hell, Hanji?!" Levi threw his cravat that he was using to clean onto the floor. Hanji really just couldn't help herself and laughed at the look of his angry face.

Hours pass by, and the sun had already set. The night was calm and peaceful, and Hanji had been gone since she last came to Levi. He had been reading a good book while drinking a cup of tea he made for himself. Levi had eventually gotten tired and fell asleep on the couch after the long read, resting peacefully after the long day. Hanji, however, waited for him to be asleep. She crept in the room along with Sasha who was in on the prank. "Are you sure about this?" Sasha whispers to the woman, who had tried not to deviously giggle. Hanji takes the marker out from her pocket and begins to carefully draw on Levi's face. "Ooooh, I'm so getting arrested," She said evilly. She drew a mustache above his lip and gave him eyeshadow on his closed eyelids. Hanji made him look so "pretty", and was proud of her art work when she was done. Levi looked rediculous with the makover. Hanji let Sasha write something on his forehead: "Cutie Pie".

Levi started to move around and finally opened his eyes, suprised to see the two young ladies in front of him as their faces turned red from held in laughter. "What the hell are you two doing here? And why do you look like you're going to explode?" He asks with suspicion. Hanji shook her head and just said, "Oh, nothing really! Just... just watching you sleep peacefully...!"

"And why would you be doing that, you creeps?" Levi asked again. The girls really tried not to laugh. "What is wrong with you two?"

"Its just that," Sasha began. "You... you look like a true 'cutie pie!'"

"Why don't you... take a look?" Hanji gave Levi a mirror, and when he finally took a good look at his face, his expression changed dramatically. There it was, "Cutie Pie" wtitten across his forehead, a black spot on his nose, and whiskers drawn on both of his cheeks. His eyelids were colored black and he had a full mustache on his lip. Levi couldn't believe how rediculous he looked! "What. The. Fuck?! Hanji! What did you do to me?!" He yells. Hanji immediately burst laughter as well as Sasha. "We gave you a make over!" Hanji told him.

"Why the hell would you do this, you little shits?!"

"Because you are a-" Hanji gets cut off as Levi demands her not to say "Cutie Pie" again. He uses his hands to rub his face to take the marker off, yet it ends up becoming a big black smudge covering his pale face making the ladies laugh even harder.

Furious, Levi quickly runs out of the office and soon out of the building, the girls following. Most of their comrads were awaken by their loud laughing and some still up witnessing the scene. Levi walked outside and found the place where all of the horses were kept and found the water trough, only to splash his face with the water to clean off his face. "Aw, I thought you liked it!" Hanji said, laughing along with Sasha. Their comrads were coming out of the building, and saw what was going on. Levi had mixed emotions inside; embarrassment and anger. When he was done, Levi gave Hanji the most scariest (to her, the cutest) stare in the world. "Who's idea was this?!"

Sasha points to Hanji truthfully, and he walked up to the energetic woman. "I'm going to kill you, Shit Glasses!" He told her, madly. Hanji shook her head again. "At least you managed to get it all off with nasty water!"

"You little bitch!"

"I am not!"

"Why did you do this to me?! All day you've been giving me bullshit. What do you want from me, Hanji? You've finally got my attention, so, what do you want?! Go on. Humor me!"

Hanji had her face emotionless for a moment, thinking about the words that Levi had just said to her. Everyone was silent and watched the intense scene. Eventually, Hanji began to grow a big, kind smile from ear to ear. "Well, it's just that...I missed you. I miss playing with my sweet little Cutie Pie! You overworked yourself so, I thought...maybe, just maybe...I could make your life more pleasurable for you... you know, by being a pain in the ass."

"You...you missed me?" Levi raised an eyebrow, looking like he didn't care, although inside he really did. Hanji nodds happily and walks over to him, and gives him a tight hug. "I'm sorry, Heichou. I just couldn't help it! Hee hee!"

Levi was unsure of what to do. He didn't want anyone to see him hug her back, as that would REALLY cause silly rumors to go around. He felt really happy inside, and was actually glad to have someone like Hanji to torture the shit out of him, only with love. He didn't want to hug her back, but he did smirk a little. "Whatever," he says, forgiving her. Hanji sighed and made a weird noise with her breath, and Levi gave her a distasteful glance. "What the hell was that?" He asks.

"Oh, nothing, just my lungs releasing itself because it loves you," Hanji jokes, not making much sence. Levi just shoved her off and scoffed. "Just marry me already, Shit Glasses."

"Whatever you say, Cutie Pie!" Hanji said with a huge smile.


End file.
